PRESSURE

BURNING PEOPLE – So my last blog entry was just before bonfire night. Well over here us expats still celebrate the event, but with a big international community around here I had to explain what it was all about. Dre who is a volunteer here from California was quite shocked that we re-enact the burning of Guy Fawks and felt the burning of people on a large bonfire was unnecessary. On the 6th the choir from the home was invited to sing at a retirement village which is managed by my friend David. The kids were so excited. As we crammed them on the old little bus we have and packed my car full of kids we headed across the city. It made me realise how sheltered their lives are, they don’t travel much around the city... well they are still kids, so it’s not like we can let them just wander around the streets! They were chatting about all the things they could see. At the concert we arrived in the grounds of the retirement village. The grass was lush green, with well kept flower patches. The kids sang for about 25 “Oldies” as David calls them. I wasn’t sure what reception they would get from some of these old colonials, but i needn’t have worried. There was plenty of applause after each song, especially Bare Necessesities. After the singing there was time for mingling, sodas for the kids and PIMS for the oldies. It was great to see the oldies (some chatting in fluent Swahili) with the kids, and showing a real interest. We also had sparklers which was awesome! The kids had never seen anything like it. It was still light outside as it was only 6pm so the sparklers didn;t look the best. David had kindly organised chips and sausages for the kids, which was a real treat! Oh and I think we went through about 14 gallons of ketchup on the chips! After we finished I felt bad, there were so many kids left back at Cheryls who had missed the treat, so we made a plan. On the way home we picked up a few crates of Sodas, more sparklers, lollipops and let some of the kids help buy (they were amazed by the posh shopping centre we went to). As we returned back to Cheryls at about 8pm, music blasting out of my car stereo (Alicia Keyes, “No One” for the 20th time and singing from the kids on the bus), all the other kids came running out to greet us. They all stood in the car park area and I proceeded to show them a sparkler!!!! They were amazed, and as I saw it sparkle I realised how much like a magic wand it must have looked. They were all desperate for one. SO in an orderly fashion and with great care each kid had one, and a soda and a lollipop. It was a great atmosphere and the party kept going before it was eventually time for bed. A fabulous night and a great way to celebrate bonfire night and the burning of Guy.

THE 18,000 – Work at Cheryls never stops... it has been particularly hectic in the last few weeks and as I find myself settling in more I am becoming used more for speaking to visitors, and general people wanting to chat with Samuel and myself. In many ways this is great, but when you have a day of work planned it can be frustrating when you get home and realise you pretty much did nothing you originally planned. The great thing is the work is good and I feel a real sense of purpose in what I am doing. The hard thing though is still the pressure. The other day we ran out of money, nothing left in the bank, and as I speek the bank is still empty, we have money coming from the UK and the USA soon, but it won’t last long... the pressure can be great and sometimes I leave the office wondering how we will move forward. One of the biggest pressures coming up is fundraising £18,000 to put down as a deposit on the land we need to purchase to build the secondary school and income generating projects. This is a massive step for us, and actually we need to raise £180,000 which is huge, but right now we need at least 10% to put down as a deposit. We will then have 6 months to raise the rest. Its hard, because the plans are so right, they are needed and everything is waiting on us purchasing the land. The hard thing is knowing we need to raise this ASAP as well as money for the general running costs. So although we have 2 key aims at the moment: 1. Get at least 90% of the kids sponsored, to help with day to day running costs and number 2. Raise £180,000 to purchase land.... doing these both at once is hard and sometimes I leave to go home, feeling a great burden on my shoulders. Where will this money come from? Who will sponsor these kids? Who can do both? Can we do it in time? What about Christmas and the massive costs in January to send the kids to back to high school, buy uniforms, pay the new term fees? Its hard and sometimes I feel like crying, sometimes I get angry, sometimes i just need to sit quietly. But when I sit and wonder where will this £18,000 come from, I remember the kids, I know their stories, I see their happy faces and know we have been able to take them from a very dark place and bring them into the light and we need to keep doing this.

RUGBY – I was so pleased to hear from my neighbour, Mo, that she had a special kit for Tag rugby, from England Rugby and it needed a home. So without any hesitation I gladly accepted and on Sunday evening I attempted to teach the boys rugby. Now remember that these are young kids, and after asking how many had ever seen a rugby match, only 1 put their hand up, it was a tough evening! Just getting the concept of running and passing the ball back was tough, but after doing some drills they were slowly getting it. It was sooooo much harder than i though it would be, but we got some of the basics. Thankfully at the end the boys were still keen and want to do it again. If i can I’ll get them to watch a rugby match on TV which should help. The kit is awesome, it comes with some TAG rugby balls, Velcro belts which you attached coloured ribbons too. Its fantastic. By next year I think we will be ready to take on the All Blacks.... well maybe! The most beautiful part was the end, the sun was setting on a glorious Sunday evening and we headed back home, walking very happy that a real man’s game had been played!

SPEILBURG CONTINUES – so the filming has continued over the last few weeks. I have just finished editing 2 films for the launch of the UK charity on the 27th Nov. They seemed to have come over well, I still need to do one more and will need to send them by DHL on Saturday to get to the launch in time, so for those of you going, they will be fresh off the DVD burner! LOL Not sure I really qualify for the status of Speilburg, but the movies should really help get a glimpse of life in Cheryls, especially the one of the day in the life of a Foster kids. Michael and Geoffrey, who we filmed, were fantastic, they are the ones that make the film what it is. Premiering on 27th Nov at St Paul’s & St George’s.

ROAD TRIPS – Once again it was time to hit the Kenyan roads and head to pick up some of the teenagers who have finished school, just doing the form four exams. On Tuesday we headed to Lukenya to pick up Lillian, as I got out the car she came running over and gave a big hug. She was pleased to see me and Mary and it was great to be there for her. The teachers checked all her luggage, as they do with all the kids, to make sure they are not stealing anything (thats sad). We also picked up one of her friends and dad, who is a pastor. We headed home and I could see Lillian was glad to be back amongst her big family here at Cheryls. Wednesday we made a long trip up North. We went past Nakuru to the place where Mary is from, Njoro. Mary is our social worker. Her kids live up north with her mum and sisters so we went to see them, in a tiny remote settlement. Mud huts with a few chickens, dogs, rabbits (rabbit pie, yummy) and some land for growing vegetables. It was so peaceful. The sun was out that day and there was a glorious blue sky, with just the sound of the farm animals and birds in the sky. Her family was so welcoming and we were served with Chipati and beans, which was yum. After a few hours there we headed to Nakuru and bought some supplies for the kids. We also stopped at a high school to see if they can take some of our kids going into secondary school next year and also because we want to move some from bad schools. Unfortunately this one doesn;t take new people after class 1. We headed to Shiners girls school to pick up Maria, she had been waiting at the gate all day for us. The other girls from Cheryls came to say hi, and we chatted and laughed for a while. They cried when we left, that was the hard bit, and although we are not their parents, you could see that, yes, we are their family and it was hard to say goodbye. We hit the road again and headed to Shiners boys, this is a bad school and we want to get the boys out of there to other schools (and one day our own school), but today was all about picking up James. He was one of the first kids I remember from our first trip here in 2004, he has had a tough upbringing, but today was his last day in school. So excited to be going home he sat by the side of the road all day waiting for us (we didn;t reach him until about 3:30pm). We caught up with the rest of the boys, chatted and then again said goodbyes, once more tears welling up in one of their eyes (they will be home for school holidays though tomorrow). Back on the road again, we listened to music, stopped for chicken and chips and eventually made it home to big welcomes from the rest of the kids.

HANGING WITH BIG K – so one night, it had been a long day, i had a late meeting with Samuel, it finished around 6pm, and I had been feeling the pressures of the place. I decided to hang around a bit. I went to sit by the fire, those cooking dinner, we chatted, talked politics, African history and how to cook, they said stay for food, so what the heck I did. Ugali and spinach then we chatted and played some more. I sat with James, Lillian and Christine who is the house mother, we talked for ages, eventually I went home, at 9pm. Sometimes after a long day the nicest thing (although still exhausting) is just spending time with the kids, chatting and hanging out, this is family. It is at these times you feel most part of a family, these are the times others don’t see, the volunteers or any visitors, this is the ordinary, the everyday, family dinner time, chatting over the fire and the dining table. This was a good night.

THE BABY IS BACK – so the other week we had what I thought could be a baby tarantula walk on my veranda floor. I knew in fact it was not a baby, they are baboon spiders, a relative of tarantulas and thankfully not quite as big as the really big ones. Well yesterday I invited all the form 4’s who have finished school and the class 8’s who have finished primary school to hang out at my house. They seemed bored at Cheryls all day while the others were still in class. So i took them to my home, stocked them with crips, biscuits, food for lunch and sodas and a whole set of DVD’s. I went back to work, but came home later to find they had now moved on to watching Die Hard 4.0 having already watched the other 3!!! We decided to make sausages and chips, but the power wasn;t working properly so we cooked on gas in the candle light. Just as I was getting things locked up around the house, ready to take the kids back to the home, I was locking the veranda door and I noticed something down near my leg on the wall..... WOOOOOOHHHHHHAAAAA there the spider was, just hanging there, on the wall, the baboon spider. It had rained heavily that day and so its home was probably washed out. We got torches, and all stared... what to do??? Ok Im the man of the house, I need to sort it out.... or maybe I can get Charles, the guard. So I wussed out a little and went to get Charles and a broom. I figured I would brush it outside as it was right by the door... or if Charles was brave he would pick it up, its only a little bit poisonous (I think???). We took photos, the spider didn;t move... what to do... in the end Charles got a shoe and placing it very close to the spider, he began to apply pressure and gently swivled the shoe... that was the end of the spider and he brushed it outside. There was a mixture of feelings, relief, guilt for murdering the poor thing and questions about where his mates might be?? In my bedroom??? Hopefully not!

FINALLY GETTING HIT – there is always so much more I could write in these blogs, and really i should plan more before I write, often I pour out what I just happen to remember or be thinking. Life has been busy though and the pressure has been mounting. There have been long days and not much rest, busy times and proposals to write, money to find and kids to pick up from school, dvds to edit and kids to play with. Eventually at the weekend I was hit with a small bug, not an insect, but some thing that was going round and I needed to stop. I slept, I watched lots of rugby and forced myself not to go to the kids home. I’m finding I am there every day, and on my days off, I still find myself there, not always working, but it can be draining. Even when I find it tough I find myself curiously lured to Cheryls, there is such a positive feeling sometimes being there with the kids, they show so much love and there are so many laughs, it can be hard to stay away. But I know I can’t spend all my free time playing with kids and I know it can then affect my office work, I am weary, I am tired, but at the end of the day, when the big pressures come and the money is needed, the food needs to be bought and an £18,000 deposit needs to be found plus all the rest, spending time with the kids is the reminder and the driving force to keep going and never give up, because at the end of the day they deserve it.